Teenagers are involved in so many activities these days. There are sports one for each season of the year that require them to attend practice as well as games. There’s band practice and games to play at as well as band competitions. Then, if they’re involved in any school clubs FBLA, FHA, FFA, FCA, or foreign language clubs they’ll have activities for those, too. How many after school activities are too many?
Do your children and teen’s activities have you running every day of the week? With younger children you’ll be responsible for taking them to scout meetings or to various practices. As they grow up and learn to drive, they can get back and forth on their own. But how do you decide which activities should stay and which should go?
Have your children been having problems completing their homework because they’re not home? Are their grades failing because they’re not doing their schoolwork or are too tired to concentrate in class? If so, you may want to consider making some changes to your family’s schedule.
Maybe you weren’t able to participate in something you wanted to do when you were younger. This may have clouded your thinking to allow your children to participate in too many extracurricular activities. Perhaps it’s time to reduce the number of things you allow your children to do.
You may want to take a serious look at the amount of time your family spends away from home. Ask each person to write down on a piece of paper all of the different things they do, when they meet, and how long the meetings are. This might include sports, band, religious activities, scouting, volunteer obligations, and parent’s business meetings.
After you’ve seen just how many activities each person is involved in, you may see the need to reduce how much time each family member spends away from home. Perhaps each person should be limited to one activity per season. Instead of allowing one person to participate in a sport and band or choir, have them choose one or the other.
If your child or teen is an athlete, their team is depending upon them to show up for practices and for each game. If they decide not to continue to play that sport after the season is over, that’s okay. However, deciding to quit in the middle of the season would affect the rest of the team. It would be better to let another activity go if they are away from home too much.
When trying to decide how many after school activities are too many, don’t forget to include your own activities. You may be too busy after work to enjoy time with your family. Your goal may be to allow the children, teens, and adults in your family to learn and enjoy activities. However, you may learn that too many activities makes the parents busy chauffeurs and children tired.
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It’s finally here. Your teen recently had a birthday and they are now old enough to get their learner’s permit to learn to drive. While you may appreciate not having to chauffeur them all over, you may wonder if your teen and driving are a good combination.
Maybe you wouldn’t view your teen learning to drive with so much trepidation if the statistics for teenage driving weren’t so dismal. From what you’ve read, you can expect traffic violations such as speeding and the accompanying fines. Then there’s the possibility of accidents and possibly worse. You’re just not sure you’re ready to let your teen behind the wheel.
Remember, however, that your teen is growing up and learning to drive is a natural part of the process. Can you recall how you felt when you were their age and were about to embark on the path to freedom? Your teen isn’t any different. They’re looking forward to being able to get around with their parents just like you did.
Does your high school offer driver’s education classes? If they do have the class, be sure to sign your teen up for it as soon as you can. Learning in a class will give them the skills they need. When your child passes the driver’s test, having driver’s ed class should also give you a discount on your car insurance. To be sure, check with your local agent.
Before they get behind the wheel for the first time, sit down and talk with them. Explain to them how important it is to follow the rules of the road. Give them the handbook they’ll need to read and know before they can take their driver’s test.
If you want them to follow the speed limit, make sure you follow the limit as well. It’s helpful to remember that more is caught than taught, and that goes for driving, too.
Explain to them that using a cell phone while driving isn’t safe. The best thing to do would be to either pull over and take the call or ask someone else to take the call. You will then be able to keep your hands on the steering wheel and your eyes on the road.
Be sure your teen always puts on their seat belt before turning the car on. This goes for everyone in the car, not just the driver. This one simple act could save their life just like it does for thousands of people each year.
Encourage your teen to pay attention to what’s going on around them even if they aren’t driving. By paying attention while a passenger, it will increase the likelihood that they’ll pay attention when it counts.
Before taking their driver’s license test, your teen will most likely ask you to take them driving. Pay attention to how well they follow the rules of the road. Compliment them if they’re doing a good job, but don’t be afraid to offer constructive criticism if they’re not doing something correctly.
Teens and driving seem to go together, at least from the standpoint of the teen. While you may not be ready for your teen to drive, it’s going to happen. Try to be supportive, give them the benefit of your experience, and ensure they’re signed up for driver’s education classes as soon as they’re ready. Before you know it your teen will be able to chauffeur you instead of it being the other way around.
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Ask anyone who has ever smoked and then quit, and they’ll tell you they wish they’d never started to smoke. Instead of starting as a teen, smoking could have been avoided. In fact, those who have been smoking for years will tell your teen that smoking is a dead-end addiction that should be avoided at all costs.
It’s important as a parent to begin talking about smoking to your children when they are young. Explain to them the dangers of smoking. Talk with them while they’re young and more willing to listen to what you have to say. It’s also important for you to be available to them in case they have questions. Always answer them as honestly as you can.
If you’ve been talking about the dangers of smoking while your children were growing up, they may feel like they’ve heard everything before when they reach their teen years. It’s important to keep talking, however. No matter how hard it may be, do everything you can to keep the lines of communication open. They’ll need your love, guidance, support, and trust now more than ever before, because peer pressure is often worst at this age.
Experts agree that the most preventable causes of death in the United States are those caused by smoking. Not only is smoking a leading cause of various types of cancer, it is also a major contributor to heart disease. If you smoke and have high cholesterol, your chances of having a heart attack greatly increase.
Many teens think that smoking makes them look older, and it’s true. The nicotine dries out the skin and makes it thinner. Chances are, however, that you don’t want to look like a piece of beef jerky. To maintain a healthy, youthful glow, avoid smoking.
Remember, if you smoke, your teen will be more likely to pick up the habit. As a parent you can do so much to encourage your teen to avoid smoking. Associating with others that don’t smoke can also have a positive effect on their choice to smoke or not.
Help your teen to deal with being offered a cigarette. Role play with them by offering them a cigarette and give them the opportunity to say “no thank you.” By role playing often, you’ll get them used to saying “no thank you” whenever someone offers them a cigarette or possibly worse.
To drive home the dangers of teen smoking, you may want to introduce your teen to someone who has smoked all their lives and has lung cancer. It may scare them and they may think you’re being cruel; however, if it scares them enough, they may decide that smoking is not for them. And that, in the long run, is the goal to keep your teen from starting to smoke in the first place.
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One thing that parents definitely don’t look forward to when their children become teens is teen peer pressure. It seems as though their previously level-headed preteen has become a totally different person overnight. You can help your teen cope with peer pressure but it may take some effort on your part.
In some cases teen peer pressure can be a good thing. A lot of that depends upon the friends that your teen has. If they are respectful, conscientious, and hard-working it is called positive peer pressure. On the other hand, if your daughter decides to dye her hair purple and begin wearing nothing but black, the friends she has have a negative peer pressure affect on her.
The simplest definition for peer pressure is friends influencing one another’s behavior. This influence can be from verbal cues, non-verbal cues, or may even be totally unconsciously passed on by their friends. If you learn to recognize the effect your child’s friends have on them, you can help them maneuver around peer pressure while they are teens. This may also help them make better decisions or avoid some typical teen pitfalls.
Remember what it was like for you as a teenager. You may be able to recall how your friends influenced your actions, thoughts, or words. Most of the peer pressure your teen will face won’t be anything to seriously worry about. However, some friends will try to encourage your teens to smoke, take drugs, drink, or experiment with sexual activity before they’re ready. These are the types of peer pressure you want to be aware of.
Maintaining an open line of communication with your teen will allow you to discuss any changes your teen may make. For instance, if your teen starts speaking to you in a derogatory manner, you may want to ask them about any new friends they have. Don’t talk to them in an accusatory fashion, but try to find out what has changed recently.
Here are some warning signs that your teen could be adversely affected by teen peer pressure and may be headed down a road they’d rather not travel:
* They dramatically change their hair, clothes, or the music they listen to. If the changes are drastic and quick, they may be hanging around with a new group of friends who are not a good influence on them.
* Skipping school is another indication that your teen is succumbing to negative peer pressure. Don’t expect your teen’s school to contact you about absences; call and ask them.
* Their grades have slipped. If your A and B student starts getting Cs or worse, this is an indication that something or someone is causing a change in them. Perhaps your child is experimenting with drugs, so don’t take this sign lightly. It truly could be a life or death situation.
* They are isolating themselves from the family. If your teen feels they need to hide something from you, they know it’s easiest to do this if they avoid you altogether. This should be a big red flag that something isn’t right.
* Changes in sleep patterns could also indicate a problem with drugs. While sleeping late may not always indicate this, if it happens quite often you’ll want to have a talk with your teen.
Teen peer pressure doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Quite often your teen’s friends will have a positive influence on them. As a parent it’s important to notice the warning signs of negative peer pressure, step in, and help them cope with the pressure they’re feeling.
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It has never been easy to be a teenager. Not when you were one and not now when you have a teen of your own. That’s why it’s so important to teach your teen about healthy relationship to begin with. Teen relationships are important and you want your child to have the best chance at having great relationships.
You want your children to have healthy relationships, and that doesn’t merely mean romantic relationships. You want their friendships to be healthy, as well. Having healthy friendships now will enable them to know what a healthy romantic relationship is like in the future. Fortunately, your teen has you to help them recognize and choose healthy teen relationships.
Physical, mental, emotional, or sexual abuse is not healthy in any way, shape, or form. In fact, one of eleven teens has been purposely hit during the past twelve months. If their friends have put them down or tried to change something about them, they could possibly be in an unhealthy relationship. Parents need to be aware of what’s going on in their teen’s life so they can recognize aspects of an unhealthy relationship and pull their teen out of a possibly dangerous place.
Healthy relationships are based on mutual respect. One person isn’t trying to control the other in any way. They are able to talk honestly about things that concern them and they share decision making. There is also mutual trust with support for each other. An unhealthy relationship, on the other hand, is not balanced at all. In fact, one person will try to manipulate or control the other by using verbal insults, putdowns, or physical violence.
Teach your teen to show respect and consideration for others and to expect the same treatment in return. If they feel they’re not being treated in a respectful manner, encourage them to end the relationship before it develops any further.
Teens also need to learn how to deal with anger in an effective, non-violent way. When they can do this, they will recognize someone who can’t and can steer clear of them.
No matter who you are, you’re probably going to have problems at one point or another. If your teen is in relationship that causes them to feel uneasy or unsafe, they’ll need to know how to diffuse a problem without allowing it to become physical. Teach them to turn problems into win-win situations for everyone involved.
It’s also important for your teen to know how to show affection for someone without having sex with them. This may seem like something you’d only worry about with your teen daughters, but your teen sons also need to know that affection and sex are not equal. This will help them to be prepared to counter the suggestion “we’d do it if you loved me.” Forewarned is forearmed.
Keep communication lines open with your teen so they know they can come to you to discuss anything they are going through. You want them to come to you with problems they may be having in their teen relationships. Encourage them to talk things that concern them and invite them to ask questions. Answer those questions honestly and they’ll be more likely to come to you if they do have serious concerns in the future.
Encourage your teens to make friends with other teens that have the same values as your family. Finally, the best way for your teen to understand about healthy relationships is to see them modeled before them. Teen relationships can be a tricky business, but they can also be the basis for lifelong friendships.
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